BusinessTN

Nothing seems more central to an executive lifestyle than a stylish and well-behaving automobile. It transcends all other conceivable luxuries: sprawling estates, designer clothes, beachfront spas and private jets. After consulting with the basic tenets of utilitarianism, we looked at the most crucial categories in the 2008 model lineup to help you narrow down the search.

Eco-Friendly
Many things come loaded with options these days, but, as Cadillac-driving, pre-Nobel-Prize-wielding Al Gore pointed out in his film, An Inconvenient Truth, we have only one environment in which to exist. So it should feel good to motor around in a vehicle that doesn't poke too many holes in the ozone layer. New to the U.S. market this holiday season is the Smart Fortwo, which has built a strong following in Europe. Not many passenger cars can navigate those old-city streets better, and they are often seen parked motorcycle-style, perpendicular to the curb. The Smart's 1.0-liter, three-cylinder engine takes it from 0 to 60 mph in a yawn-inducing 13.3 seconds, but its novelty factor, coupled with the miniscule base price ($12,000) make it an excellent gift idea for Christmas or Valentine's Day. Our advice is to avoid driving this golf cart-sized sedan on I-40 amid 18-wheelers. Take it to Florida in a trailer and leave it there.

Sport
Thank heavens that Mercedes-Benz stopped putting four-cylinder engines in its automobiles. Nice try, but they were just too loud. New this year is the C-Class from Mercedes, featuring much-improved looks, a six-cylinder engine and doors that, according to recent television ads, can hold 220-pound men when opened. This must be a feature for the frat parties, because when else do humans feel compelled to hang on opened car doors? Come spring, the new C-Class should look especially alluring in dark-gray or red on the Sewanee, or Rhodes College campus, but consider yourself warned: It will be lost among other rapier-like sedans on the corporate centre parking lot. It's possible that you would enjoy a Mercedes-Benz CLS-Class, the world's first-ever four-door coupe that pioneered in 2006. The Music Row glitterati we've seen driving it definitely turn heads, but fellows should be careful. As one image-conscious executive pointed out, if you're a man intent on being seen in a CLS, it must be either silver or black. We drove the 2008 CLS550, which is a few horses shy of the CLS63 AMG, and it disappointed with pickup. In all fairness, this car is a bit heavy to be considered a sporty coupe. Its stunning looks and ventilated seats notwithstanding, the CLS's accelerator pedal demands as much exertion as the one attached to a well-kept Mercedes S500, circa 1997 (which these days retails for $10,000 at an used-car lot near you). Perhaps BMW's upcoming four-door coupe would have a quicker get-up-and-go. Frankly, in terms of handling and fahrvergnuegen, any sporty BMW would be a good bet in this segment. Don't listen to the Infinity and Acura apologists. The Munich engineers have been building sports cars since the dawn of the Automotive Age, and they are great at it. BMW's new M3 coupe, the first-ever with a V8, 4.0-liter, 420 horsepower engine, takes the lightweight auto from 0 to 60 mph in 4.8 seconds. Once sales commence in mid-2008, it will be available as a hard-top convertible.

Luxury
In the vulgar ostentation department, we need to take a trip in the Maybach machine. Four years into its not-so-mass production, the Mercedes' Maybach (pronounced "My-bock") brand is still very much a rarity in Tennessee. There is not a single dealer selling them here, and the closest one, in Tampa, sold only three exemplars last year. The asking price of the new Maybach 62S—some $400,000—may explain why. One negative is that it doesn't already come with a chauffeur, as any 20-foot-long vehicle with luxury leather recliners in rear certainly should. A close second in this category is the Rolls-Royce Phantom—though it comes sans recliners, and there might be a waiting list—or a large sailboat.

Sport Utility/Light Truck
To paraphrase Nikolai Gogol, what American doesn't like an SUV? Not to be overlooked this year is the 2008 Acura MDX ($40,195), which along with the BMW X5 was recently the most-researched SUV on ForbesAuto.com. The Lexus RX has been ranked the most fuel-efficient, and the all-new GL-Class features the biggest star ever placed on the grille of a Mercedes-Benz. All of the above would be excellent if you're planning on getting stuck in the early spring mud en route to Blackberry Farm, or taking the in-laws out to dinner. Good luck shopping, and Godspeed.